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1. What are behavioral / physical indicators of sexual abuse?

Possible indicators include:

• A fear of certain places, people, or activities, especially being alone with certain people (children should never be forced or coerced into giving affection)
• Difficulty walking or sitting
• Disturbed sleep / frequent nightmares
• Drastic change in school performance
• Loss of appetite or trouble eating or swallowing
• Pain, itching, bleeding, fluid, or rawness in the private areas
• Reverting back to outgrown behavior, such as bedwetting or thumbsucking
• Sexual behavior or knowledge beyond their years
• Sexually acting out on younger children
• Sudden mood swings, withdrawal, rage, fear, or anger
• Using new words for private body parts

Not all of these indicators will mean that your child has been victimized. Some behaviors listed can be part of normal development or stress. The greater the number of indicators present and the more sudden the onset, the more reason you have to be concerned. Physical evidence in genital or rectal areas must be taken seriously and treated immediately.

2. If I know of an offender that is not in your database, should I contact you?

Yes! Please contact the Criminal Investigations Unit at (405) 359-4424.

3. I recently received a sex offender notification. What should I tell my young child?

Explain the concept of tricky people and boundaries to your child. For specific tips on how to handle the situation with your child, see the Tricky People and Boundaries page.

4. Is most childhood sexual abuse committed by strangers?

No. Strangers are not the most common perpetrators of sexual abuse. Most children are sexually abused by someone known or related to them, often in a position of trust or authority. Studies indicate that no more than 10-30% of sex offenders were strangers, meaning that up to 90% of children sexually abused had some type of relationship with their abuser.

Children are abused most often by someone that they know, such as a relative, the best liked coach, the pillar of the community, pediatrician, teacher, scout leader, or religious leader. Tricky people look just like you and me, but they try to manipulate our children into certain actions or situations.

5. What can I do to help prevent my child from being sexually abused or abducted?

Establish and explain healthy boundaries with your child and explain that people have certain roles. For example, their music teacher teaches them music, and their sports coach teaches sports. It is important to be aware and understand the limits or boundaries of those relationships.

Educate yourself and your children as to the tricks that perpetrators use to lure and / or groom children. Stranger Danger child-prevention education is outdated and does not address the reality that most children have an established relationship with the abuser or abductor. The National Center For Missing and Exploited Children stresses the importance of educating children using clear, calm, reasonable messages about situations and actions to look out for instead of confusing profiles or images of strangers. The Yello Dyno program educates children about tricky people who establish relationships with children or their families for the primary purpose of abusing them.

Incarcerated pedophiles tell us to be suspicious if someone seems more interested in your children than you. One convicted offender said, "parents are so naive. They're worried about strangers and should be worried about their brother-in-law. They just don't realize how devious we can be." Another offender told parents that they should, "Know that we will use any way we can to get to children."

Always monitor your children while they are on the internet and stress the importance of never giving out their name and address.